the ultimate truth -"dust to dust ....ashes to ashes "

well the truth is we all have to live in the real world
not in the fantasy land or an illusion
coz it will be fooling ourselves
and we hate when other do so to us
so ....coming back to the land of living

the ultimate truth is
we come alone
go away alone
taking nothin with us
then y do we crave for more
y do we need someone more than the other
we as person are the most selfish of the lot
[ i am talking abt me myself ]
if we donot get a toy
we donot allow others to enjoy
just get them to be annoyed

[stupid wording makes little sense i hope]

the ultimate truth being dust to dust and ashes to ashes

i write with the feeling of missing my mom
who i really really missing
for she was always there to be by my side
w/o asking for anythin
she would say to me
" that u will understand my worth when i have gone "
i would always fool around with her on that
makes u wonder hom many moments i could have spent with her
more purposefully

the last one week of her life
was a blessing in disguise
for she enjoyed it
to the utmost
lived to the fullest
knowing that the days are few and numbered

she made use of every moment
and didnt let it wile away
living it up
cherishing it

she left behind a family incomplete
who were pretty uncompetent
at dealing with life
w/o her prospective towards it

the last 2 days of her life
were spent in lifeless state
there or not there
we were thinking
making it we were hoping

but reality come face to face with me
and makes me see it aint any more
they tell to me to sign the papers
for not treating her anymore
late at night
by her bedside
i sit
and bid adieu to her
tell her to go
we will manage
cant see the pain on her face anymore
she still asks me r u sure
i tell her we will

that was the last i spoke to her
and then she was no more

felt an empty void
after that cudnt feel anything more
went on an auto phase
asking wht next is to be done

came home at 4
to tell the rest she is no more
her sisters were there
but cudnt tell them more
she came home to start her last destination
in the cremation place

as a hindu the son performs last rites
but i fought for the rights to perform the rites
coz this was the only way i cud let her go
seeing that she aint no more
while the embers were glow
watched her burn till her body was no more
but was hoping she would hold me once more
but that wasnt going to happen anymore forever

................